Emerging from the Shadows:
A Journey of Resilience and Rediscovery

2021 was a rough year for many people. It may have looked like I had it all together on the outside but the inside has been a different story.

Rewind to the fall of 2014 when I was diagnosed suddenly with kidney failure.  4 years later, on dialysis and health declining drastically, I had finally accepted that I was not likely going to live to do all the things I had put off.  One month later, in October 2018, I was given the gift of life - a kidney from a deceased donor. As I was recovering, I saw the world differently.  I felt as though I had to do all the things, go all the places; before time ran out. I had taken photos for years and always appreciated the beauty around me, but now saw things around me with new eyes.  

I’d tried explaining how I was feeling, the turmoil that was going on inside my mind, but I felt as though I wasn’t understood.  People didn’t get it.

What if there was no next year, next month, next week; OR a tomorrow.

After 2 years of injuries to both legs that left me unable to hike and then walk properly, I went into the latter half of 2021 in a state of depression.  All the dreams in my head dissolved.  I cried them all away and retreated into survival mode.  A place I knew well.  I retreated from friends, the outdoors, life. 

One day I was watching a show about near-death experiences and burst into tears.  What the person was describing was exactly what was going on in my head.  As I watched and listened, I felt a sense of calm come over me.  As if I was being reassured that what I was going through was ok.  To roll with the emotions, work with them instead of against them. That is was ok that I was now different.  Different inside and outside.  

Life is not all sunshine and warm weather.  It’s sometimes about being uncomfortable, pushing your mind and body to the limit.  And the desire to live forcing you to go on.

​I need to show the world what I am now able to understand and see through my wide-open eyes.  My journey from the dark back to the light.  Realizing I need to let the emotion out instead of keeping it locked inside.  

I want to share my photos with the world.  To help others realize that even through all of the darkness, keep searching for the light no matter how dim it may be.  Keep blinking, Keep fighting, it’s there somewhere. Reach out to others and let them know how you are feeling. Open your heart and soul, you’ll find someone who will encourage you to keep fighting. To keep creating.  To want to get up in the morning. 

Life truly is a gift and I am not done opening all the boxes yet.

Dedicated to the beautiful soul who took the images of me on this website.

​Met too late, gone too soon, never, ever forgotten.